On Tue, 9 Oct 2018 16:03:58 -0700, Dimensional Traveler
Post by Dimensional Traveler
Man invented fire so he could see naked women in the dark.
Hey, someone else watched Coupling. Or maybe it's a coincidence.
Anyway, that's very close to a quote from one of my favorite bits of
that show, when discussion at a dinner party turns to the subject of
why the character Steve had a porn movie called "Lesbian Spank
Inferno" in his VCR:
"Oh, because it's got naked women in it!
Look, I like naked women! I'm a bloke! I'm supposed to like them!
We're born like that. We like naked women as soon as we're pulled out
of one. Halfway down the birth canal we're already enjoying the view.
Look, it's the four pillars of the male heterosexual psyche. We like:
naked women, stockings, lesbians, and Sean Connery best as James Bond.
Because that is what being a bloke is. And if you don't like it,
darling, join a film collective.
I want to spend the rest of my life with the woman at the end of the
table here. But that does not stop me wanting to see several thousand
more naked bottoms before I die. Because that's what being a bloke is.
When Man invented fire, he didn't say "Hey, let's cook!" He said:
"Great! Now we can see naked bottoms in the dark!" As soon as Caxton
invented the printing press we were using it to make pictures of -
hey! - naked bottoms. We've turned the Internet into an enormous
international database of... naked bottoms.
So, you see, the story of male achievement through the ages, feeble
though it may have been, has been the story of our struggle to get a
better look at your bottoms. Frankly, girls, I'm not so sure how
insulted you really ought to be."